Imposter Syndrome Loves an Empty Room
When I first started writing, there were days I sat in my office and didn’t talk to another soul for eight straight hours.
My days were all the same. I would get up in the morning and get my coffee. Then, I would scroll social media and see all the cool content the authors I followed were creating and be jealous of their amazing ideas. Then, I would sit down at my computer and stare at the screen.
One day of the week, I would write my long-form blog content. Then, I would spend the rest of my day creating social media content and scheduling it to Pinterest, Instagram, and Facebook. The other days of the week, I would write my manuscript, edit it, revise it, rework it, and repeat the process all over again.
In the breaks between my writing, I would scour social media and admire the engagement other authors were getting. I would look at my own interactions and be frustrated, wondering how all of these other authors had it all figured out while I was desperately grasping at straws but consistently publishing content.
By the time 5:00 p.m. rolled around, I would get up from my desk and realize I hadn’t spoken a single word to another living person all day.
The problem wasn’t that I was alone.
The problem was that I was alone with my thoughts.
Why Isolation Fuels Imposter Syndrome
As authors, we spend a ton of time alone with unfinished manuscripts, social media content calendars, unpublished blog series, and to-do lists a mile long. This isolation doesn’t allow us to see the struggles other authors are experiencing. We don’t see them struggling. We don’t hear them admit they’re scared. We don’t realize they’re wrestling with the same questions we are.
We only see their polished posts and finished work.
We assume we are the only ones struggling, that everyone else is confident, and we’re the fraud in the room.
That’s simply not true.
While I was working, writing, learning, and creating, it was an extremely lonely and isolating time. It wasn’t until I changed my routine and began purposefully and meaningfully interacting with other authors that I realized imposter syndrome is the loudest in the isolation.
I’ve talked to so many different authors who struggle with this same loneliness, isolation, and the ensuing imposter syndrome. While I don’t have all the answers, I hope these strategies give you encouragement and breathe new life into you today.
Begin Your Morning with Intentional Quiet
The world around us is exceptionally loud, even when we’re sitting in the loneliness of the author life. Hearing the still, small whisper of God through the noise can be challenging, even when we’re sitting alone at our desks.
Intentionally embracing the quiet through a short Bible study or devotion and following it up with dedicated time to sit in God’s presence, journal your prayers, and simply be still is a great reminder that we are never alone. It’s also the perfect way to ground ourselves in our calling before we ever type a single word for the day.
Find Your People
I’d be lying to you if I said I found my writing friends as soon as I started writing. It took me months, if not years, to build relationships with writers whose values aligned with mine.
I joined Facebook groups, posted on daily share threads, and encouraged other writers. The truth is simple: not everyone in those groups reciprocated. Over time, though, I learned who was faithful and consistent. Every day, I popped into those groups, posted my content, and spent fifteen minutes engaging with those I knew would do the same.
Over time, I began to get to know these writers for more than just their content. I joined their launch teams, they joined mine, and we got to know each other beyond the page. I know I can count on these folks, and they know they can count on me because we have built genuine friendships.
Eventually, I branched out from those share-based Facebook groups and joined other author communities. I’ve been blessed to find my people in each of these spaces.
Your people are out there as well.
You won’t find them without putting in the time and effort. And you won’t build genuine relationships with them without putting yourself out there.
I would encourage you today to find two or three different communities and join them.
Build Relationships with Your Readers
It took me a long time to accept that my friends were not my fans.
I could say it out loud, but in my heart, I wanted my friends to be my readers. It wasn’t until I began building my Instagram and Substack accounts that I accepted the reality that I needed to build stronger relationships with my actual readers instead of posting content on my personal Facebook page and hoping I would get some love from my friends.
Here’s a simple strategy for getting to know your readers. I call it the 15-15-15 Rule.
Set a recurring alarm for three different times during the day. You could do 8:00 a.m., 12:00 p.m., and 6:00 p.m. Then, when the alarm goes off, set a timer for fifteen minutes.
Use each fifteen-minute stretch to engage with your readers on Instagram, Facebook, Substack, LinkedIn, YouTube, or wherever your audience spends their time. Respond to comments. Respond to DMs. Comment on posts. Genuinely engage with thoughtful comments and watch what happens.
You’ll begin to build real relationships and get to know your readers in a way you haven’t in the past.
Stop Consuming More Than You Create
It’s so easy to go down the social media rabbit hole these days.
If you’re like me and have tons of author friends on your social media feeds, you can quickly become overwhelmed thinking everyone else’s launches are bigger, everyone else’s platforms are stronger, and everyone else’s writing is better.
Comparison is the killer of confidence.
I would encourage you to commit to only spending the forty-five minutes I mentioned above on social media consuming and interacting with others. Limits and boundaries can be some of the best ways to keep imposter syndrome at bay.
You Are Not the Only One
I still sit alone in my office for eight hours a day most days. What’s changed for me, though, is I no longer do it in isolation. I interact with my people, I join Zoom calls, and I am constantly engaged with other authors through coffee dates, email, and texts—sometimes too much, if I’m being honest!
The cure for imposter syndrome has never been selling more books, gaining more followers, or growing an email list. The cure for imposter syndrome is understanding you are not alone in your struggles or challenges. It’s remembering to return daily to the One who placed this passion in your heart and calling on your life. It’s finding your people and building authentic relationships with them.
So, if you’ve been trying to outwork your imposter syndrome, let this be your permission to try something different.
Text another author.
Join the Facebook group.
Attend the Zoom call.
Reply to the newsletter.
Comment on the post.
Send the email.
Introduce yourself.
The voice in your head wants you to believe you’re the only one who feels this way.
You’re not.
Somewhere, another writer is staring at a half-finished manuscript, wondering if they’re qualified enough, talented enough, experienced enough, or visible enough to keep going.
The best thing you can do for both of you is reach out. You might discover that what you thought was imposter syndrome was actually isolation all along.
Reflection Questions
Where has isolation amplified my doubts, fears, or feelings of inadequacy as a writer?
What is one practical step I can take this week to build a meaningful connection with another writer or reader?
Am I spending more time consuming other people’s work than creating my own? What boundary might help me restore that balance?
I write in two spaces. A Seat at the Table is where I explore faith, healing, and making room for honesty after it’s been made complicated. Ink & Intention is for writers who want to show up with clarity, discernment, and integrity—especially online.
I’m also the author of Breathing Again and several guided journals, and I work with writers who want thoughtful, grounded support as they find their voice and shape what comes next.
If you’re a writer looking for thoughtful encouragement, practical strategy, and honest conversations about the writing life, you’re also welcome to join us inside The Visible Author Facebook Community.
If something here resonated, you’re welcome to explore more at your own pace. You can find everything in one place at KristenNeighbarger.com.
